Who said that? – feeling invisible as you get older and what to do about it.

We hear so many women over 45 saying they have noticed that they appear to have become invisible, either at work, to the opposite sex or just in general life.  No need for Harry  Potter’s invisibility cloak, age has done the job for you!

Sometimes that suits us just fine as we don’t seek to gain a lot of attention from our actions. However the flip side of that is that it might make you feel under valued, unappreciated, sad or annoyed. Combine the invisibility affect with the mood swings that some women are affected by during perimenopause and you could end up literally in a hot mess.

So what’s a woman to do?

Challenge yourself: Change something. Take on a new and exciting challenge. If you’ve ever fancied trekking across the Andes on a llama, now’s the time to do it. Of course you don’t have to go to extremes. Simply changing the sorts of clothes you wear can be a challenge for some women.

Seek out attention, and not in a negative way by screaming, shouting and becoming a drama queen. Make an effort to strike up conversations with new people – you never know who you’re going to meet. Think up some new conversation openers that will lead to interesting and varied interactions.

Decide what you want and the best way to get noticed. Make a plan and go for it. If it all feels a bit uncomfortable or too much of a leap then taking small incremental steps will get you there – it may be a bit slower but if you get on the path and keep going you’ll get there.  If you remember the film Finding Nemo – just keep swimming.

Grow your confidence. Feeling invisible can lead to a lack of confidence and you owe it to yourself to build yours up. Start by adopting an assertive posture, stand up straight and smile. Think positive thoughts. Repeat affirmations to yourself out loud and regularly. Banish negative thoughts. Take notice of the thoughts you have and  whether they are negative or positive. When you think a negative thought, become aware of it and ask yourself how you could turn it into a plus.

Think of positive role models for older women. Many women in the public eye  have spoken recently about their menopause and how they have overcome and problems. Learn from them and ape their successes. Some of our favourites are Joanna Lumley and Helen Mirren.

Get support from like minded women and share how you overcome the challenge of being unseen. Our Facebook group is a great place to start. Feel free to join us there for support and a great place to share your triumphs and tribulations. Here’s the link